TOTS 100 - UK Parent Blogs

Thursday, 17 May 2012

Time!.....Or lack of it

Apologies to all my regular readers, i haven't had any time to write anything recently, and even if i had tried i don't think i would have managed to make any sense. I have been so busy and therefore so tired that i have collapsed once the children have gone to bed. I have lots of projects that have been started and need finishing off. I will now try to catch you all up on what i have been creating and doing.

Firstly, my Victorian Costume is all finished and we have had our school day out to Preston Manor. It was a very cold but lovely day. The children were in awe of the staff who played the part of housekeeper and under butler. They were very strict and told them off for the slightest thing. I didn't panic too much about going on the bus, but the lead up to it while getting dressed was a challenge. My instinct was to run away and hide under my covers and say i was ill. But i didn't i forced myself to go.

I am not happy with the jacket of my costume, it doesn't look like the picture and will be changed once i have more time.

We have done another Craft fair. Unfortunately this time i didn't sell anything, but mum, Claire and Nana did. The day was still good though and worth going as it did mean i got some more of my commission done- that shrug is now almost half done.

The Museum Events are as busy as ever. We have a talk tomorrow night and have sold over half the tickets so far, we normally get some people turn up on the door so it should be busy.
The Diamond Jubilee Jaunt is getting some people on the registration form. My son is one of them and has already got some sponsors. Although if anyone reading this is willing to sponsor him then please contact me. He is doing his best to let people his age know about the events and get them interested in attending them and the Museum itself. I think that this is an admirable trait for a 12 year old to have. Then 3 days after the jaunt he will be down at the De La Warr Pavillion helping out our local Astronomy Group (ESAS) with a day of facts and finding out about the star systems. They will have telescopes set up, a children's play area where they can build things related to stars and planets. Talks on Astronomy and many other things. He has volunteered to give up his Bank Holiday to help them raise awareness to younger people.

I have more sewing to do for the next Craft Fair, this time some felt bags and another quilt. maybe it will sell as quickly as the last one! I do hope so.

I'm actually exhausted writing all this. My 2nd therapy session was today and went ok, i came out having not cried this time- an achievement, and the therapist was very pleased with what i had attempted since Thursday. Its very hard writing down all the individual feeling that occur with a panic attack, and how they change as the attack builds, but at the same time its a good exercise to do in order to separate all the strands.
I'm lucky, i have very good support in my closest friend and my mum. Not many people know how badly restricted i am because they normally see me out with a friend or mum. But if people think about it- How many times have any of them seen me out alone in the last 6 years if not longer- Only a handful, because i avoid it as much as possible. It has restricted me an awful lot and now i am finally doing something about it.
I have homework to do, and one of the things is to challenge myself to work up my Avoidance Hierarchy over the next 6-12 weeks. I have added another on there and i am letting everyone who follows my blog know that i am a sufferer, and should i attempt to do something out of the ordinary that it is a big deal!! It may not seem it to you, but to me going out on my own, or going to a busy place alone, or even going somewhere unknown to me is a major thing. These are just a small set of examples of my avoidance things.
If i pluck up the courage i may write them all out for you all to see- who knows some of you may find it interesting and be able to relate. Those of you who don't then fair enough but please don't judge me. I do find this a good way of working things out in my brain.

2 comments:

  1. Go girl you are very brave and I love you for it. I am not sure I could do it x

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  2. I hope you do find the strength to write about your Avoidance Hierarchy on your blog. I found it strangely helpful to write about my Food Neophobia on my blog! You will accomplished all your goals even if it takes longer than you expect it to, it will happen. You can do it. You have me to support you after all as well as your Mum! Hugs X

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