Something my mum said to me the other day sprung to mind again earlier today. One of her resolutions for the year was not to judge others so quickly. Now i wouldn't say that my mum was the judging sort, she has always been very accepting of others. Never really bats an eye at people from different races, or those with a different quality of life. She has accepted every friend and boyfriend home equally, She's always supported everyone she can and even gone above and beyond what friendship would call for to help without even asking questions. So i am slightly confused at her choice of resolution. I think this is something that maybe i need to discuss with her and find out what she means by it.
Anyway on to my reason for posting. I realised today that i have been becoming judgemental of people without realising it. Someone will make a comment and i find myself agreeing to it without actually questioning why does that person do this, or live like that, or behave in that manner. So in keeping with my updating you all of my aims for this year, i am going to attempt to stop agreeing instantly and hold back. I'm not going to just judge them for what we see on the outside but think about the situation first.
Judge instantly is very easy and quick to do, i've had it done to me many times. I still have it done to me, particularly when i mention i can't do certain things that are physical. I look ok, i generally sound ok so i must be fine. These people don't see me crawling up the stairs at the end of the day, or sliding down them in the morning. They don't see me dropping hot pans or burning myself on hot things because i am shaking so much. They don't see me falling asleep while doing something because i am so tired, or worse still not being able to get out of bed because of the pain or tiredness.
Everyone behaves the way they do for a reason, and it is not another persons right to judge them for it. We should be accept each other for our differences and be willing to try and understand them. This is something i will be making a bigger effort to do this year.
I do try to be non-judgmental but don't always succeed, I try to be open minded and give people the benefit of the doubt and see both sides of a siuation but I don't always succeed.
ReplyDeleteWhat I meant was that I have slid into the way of being critical about people. It is wrong of me after all who am I to critcise what a person says or does, after all I don't walk in their shoes or know why they are like they are and what has happened to make them that way. it does them no good and it does me no good either.
I am finding this hard to explain but it is also part of the not being negative or thinking negative thoughts. It is bad for my soul